#Complicit January 13

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Listening to the Tim Ferris Podcast interview last Sunday. His guest was Jerry Colonna a financier turned life coach. A link to that interview is here.

Jerry enlightened me about what it means to understand how each of us is COMPLICIT for our lives.

Jerry was telling Tim that there is a difference when people hear that they are COMPLICIT for their lives versus being responsible. The subtle but powerful difference is COMPLICIT causes us to become unhappy. Responsible has a high degree of accountability so most people won’t accept it.

As a life coach Jerry wanted to use that word COMPLICIT to help people change. He took the advice his therapist gave him in 2002 when he contemplated taking his own life.

He said that we become COMPLICIT when we do not answer three questions honestly. These especially apply to relationships.

1. What am I not saying that needs to be heard?

2. What am I saying that is not being heard?

3. What is being said that I am not hearing?

If you find your life is not in a joyful place maybe some reflection on the answers to these three questions is in order.

Not answering means we are COMPLICIT.

You deserve to be happy don’t be COMPLICIT in your own unhappiness.